αʟʟ ᴛoo ɯeʟʟ ᴛαчʟoʀ sɯɩꜰᴛ.› ⋅ ∿ ♡
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αʟʟ ᴛoo ɯeʟʟ ᴛαчʟoʀ sɯɩꜰᴛ.› ⋅ ∿ ♡
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And I know it's long gone and, that magic's not here no more, and I might be okay, but I'm not fine at all. Photo album on the counter, your cheeks were turnin' red, you used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin-sized bed and your mother's tellin' stories 'bout you on the tee-ball team, you taught me 'bout your past thinkin' your future was me. And you were tossing me the car keys, Fuck The Patriarchy keychain on the ground, we were always skippin' town and I was thinkin' on the drive down: any time now he's gonna say it's love. You never called it what it was until we were dead and gone and buried. Check the pulse and come back swearing, it's the same after three months in the grave, and then you wondered where it went to as I reached for you, but all I felt was shame and you held my lifeless frame. And I know it's long gone and there was nothing else I could do, and I forget about you long enough to forget why I needed to. And there we are again when nobody had to know, you kept me like a secret, but I kept you like an oath, sacred prayer and we'd swear to remember it all too well. Well, maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much, but maybe this thing was a masterpiece until you tore it all up. Runnin' scared, I was there, I remember it all too well. And you call me up again just to break me like a promise, so casually cruel in the name of bein' honest, I'm a crumpled-up piece of paper lyin' here 'cause I remember it all, all, all. They say all's well that ends well but I'm in a new hell every time, you double-cross my mind. You said if we had been closer in age maybe it would've been fine, and that made me want to die. The idea you had of me, who was she? A never-needy, ever-lovely jewel, whose shine reflects on you. Not weepin' in a party bathroom, some actress askin' me what happened: you. That's what happened, you. Time won't fly, it's like I'm paralyzed by it, I'd like to be my old self again but I'm still tryin' to find it after plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own. Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone, 'cause there we are again when I loved you so, back before you lost the one real thing you've ever known, it was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well. |